He will not stop until I am complete

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I’m forcing myself to sit down and write. I feel like I have had nothing to say for the last 6 months, so I haven’t bothered writing. Now, it’s time to just sit down and write. This post is more of an update than anything super profound. The last 6 months have been harder than the first with adding another child to the family. I’m not exactly sure why, but they just have been.

To risk sounding cliche, Continue reading

When your child. . . changes.

11705308_10152855198341949_849536273481950682_nI’m not sure what I expected before I became a mom. I think you hope your child will be good and kind and gracious but at the end of the day you sort of *expect* that they WILL be. I’m surprised at my own surprise at my son’s sin nature. What did I expect? That I would have this perfect son who tells me he loves me all day long and plays quietly in a corner and eats all of his food without ever complaining? Well no. . . Or did I? Because I seem certainly taken by surprise by the child that wakes up every morning starting the day off with a battle.ย  Continue reading

The Acceptance of Motherhood

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For 7 years, summersย were:

sleeping in until 9:00.

making coffee and eating cereal while watching Kelly and Michael.

afternoons spent babysitting a spunky girl by the pool.

reading. reading. and so much reading.

long summer evening walks with my husband, hand in hand, dreaming and laughing.

I was a teacher, so while the school year was intense, summers were blissful. School years were amazing in different ways. I loved what I did, and felt validated doing it. I got to act, direct, and teach. My schedule was packed with helping students, rehearsals, and still time to spend with my husband at home.

Why am I telling you all of this? Continue reading

Good News (and the fear in my eyes)

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I apologize I have been so silent lately! As most of you know, my husband and I are expecting baby #2 in September! The first trimester sucked all my energy from me and I was in a constant state of “fog.” I really didn’t have any desire to get on here and write. Also, all of those wonderful goals and plans went out the window. Back to raisin brand in the mornings over here! I hope to get back on track soon. I have been pretty nauseous and the nausea is just now going away. Yay!

Our little ones will be exactly Continue reading

These are the days

s2014jacphotography-kaser064Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am a huge fan of the television show Parenthood. The show is on its last leg with only 2 episodes left in the series. I always get a little sentimental at the end of a favorite series. I am the same way with the end of a good book. These characters cease to exist and their lives must be tidied up, and I have to hope and trust that the writer or author does the story and the characters justice.

I just finished watching last night’s episode and I was lying in bed awake, knowing I just had to write this post. If you haven’t seen last night’s episode there are some minor spoilers headed your way. Continue reading

Waiting for Christmas

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Growing up, Christmas and the new year were both always a big deal to me. On New Year’s Eve we would host a big all-nighter, and before everyone would come over, I would sit in my room and think about the past year. I would journal about it and get all sentimental thinking about all that had happened and all that was before me in the coming year. During the Christmas season, I would savor every contata (I went to a cantata church!), every school Christmas event, and every precious moment of the season. Since then, time and busyness of life have stolen these sweet moments from me. Continue reading

Help my unbelief

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So, its been a while! Of course, part of the reason for that is because I am chasing my sweet 14 month old all over the place. But, another reason is that I started this blog to help with my anxiety. Honestly, the past couple months, I have been feeling really good. I will always struggle with anxiety, but the intensity of my struggle has gotten better. Also, I was encouraged to never write a blog piece unless I felt compelled to write. Lately, I Continue reading