These are the days

s2014jacphotography-kaser064Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am a huge fan of the television show Parenthood. The show is on its last leg with only 2 episodes left in the series. I always get a little sentimental at the end of a favorite series. I am the same way with the end of a good book. These characters cease to exist and their lives must be tidied up, and I have to hope and trust that the writer or author does the story and the characters justice.

I just finished watching last night’s episode and I was lying in bed awake, knowing I just had to write this post. If you haven’t seen last night’s episode there are some minor spoilers headed your way.

It is clear that the writers of Parenthood are focusing on the circle of life as they close out this beautiful series. One of the fathers, Adam, sits on the floor and has a tea party with his young daughter, even sporting a feather boa to keep her happy. Amber awaits the arrival of her new little baby, and we see her struggle with thinking she isn’t going to be good enough.

But, what really got me was the final scene. The older couple (the matriarch and patriarch) of the show goes to their old home where they raised their kids. They see the new family has overtaken their home with toys and love and fun. Two little boys run around outside playing with each other while a pregnant mother calls them inside. Zeke and Camille sit and watch and you know they are reminiscing on this life that used to be theirs. The life that somehow slipped through their fingers so silently and quickly like trying to hold water in their hands. Camille says that the mother certainly has her hands full.

Zeke replies, “I bet she is enjoying every minute.” (paraphrase.)

I cannot stop thinking about that final scene. That particular stage of life is just beginning for me. Right now, life is….

toys everywhere

little sippy cups in every nook and cranny

big crocodile tears when mommy leaves for a little while

little feet pattering down the hallway

early morning chit-chatting I can hear so clearly on the monitor

wet, sloppy kisses MULTIPLE times a day

diapers strewn every which way in the house

an excited squeal and running to the door when daddy comes home

a sloppy kitchen

smiles that make my heart literally melt

and lots and lots of routine

It’s the same thing every day. That part gets discouraging. And I so wish I could take those discouraging moments and always bring myself to the place I am at in this moment.

It goes so fast.

If there is one thing I have heard more than ANYTHING else these last 16 months it is by far, “Enjoy it, because it goes so fast.” We blink, and they are gone. If only I could freeze the moments when my sweet boy is snuggling close (because those moments are rare! ha!). If only I could tell him to slow down because mommy isn’t ready for each new milestone quite yet. If only I could stop worrying about whether I would ever be able to handle another child, yet alone any more than two.

Each day truly is a gift. I feel like this phrase has become cliche. So, I mean it with all my heart. God is gracious to gift me with each new day I have with my family. I waste my days with worry and fear of things unknown. I waste my days frustrated with Logan because of a new attitude or teeth coming in with a vengeance. But when it’s all said and done, I will miss it. I will miss it so much it will hurt.

Just like Zeke and Camille, looking over the young family with a sense of nostalgia, I know seasoned parents look at me and smile, and maybe even say “I bet she is enjoying every minute.”

And you know what? I intend to. Whatever it takes – I intend to.

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What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.

One thought on “These are the days

  1. Becca, as always I enjoy your blogs. Often they bring me back to when I was a new Mom and I relish the memories. Thank God Logan is growing up with much love from both Mom and Dad. Love you, Nanny

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