Disclaimer: My “official-according-to-my-social-security-card” name is Rebecca Hervas Kaser. I dropped my middle name because I never really liked it that much, and I really wanted to keep my maiden name. I love being a Kaser and I embrace all things Kaser, but Hervas blood still runs through me. And I like that. It’s what makes me who I am.
My given middle name is “Joy.” As I was thinking up a name for this blog, I thought about my middle name and how ironic it was that most of my days were lacking joy. I think it hit me how incredibly sad that was. I have many days of happiness, but the moments are short-lived. I soon enter that world of “what-if’s” and my mind soars to things that make me scared to my core. You see, I believe with all my heart that as a follower of Christ, I will suffer many trials and hardships. He says in His Word:
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.” I Peter 4:12-13 ESV
So, I am always waiting for the bottom to fall out from under me. When is that tragedy going to strike? What will it be? I feel self-conscious admitting this because it is truly a horrible way to think and live. But, I’m banking on the fact that someone else out there may feel the same way. WHY has God blessed me so abundantly? A quote from a blog I read recently said, “God has blessed me beyond what is fair. And that unfairness is one of the great struggles of my life.” I relate so much. The link to that blog can be found here.
But. Here’s the thing. I am living in a constant wave of tomorrows. I am missing the todays. That grieves me. Matthew 6:34 has been beyond encouraging to me lately. Here is the verse from The Message.
“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”
Today is July 4th. I am going to spend the day with my family and friends. I have a sweet husband by my side and a baby in my arms. Why is this moment so wonderful? I don’t know. But, there will be grace for tomorrow when it is tomorrow. Find joy in this beautiful moment, whether we are suffering the fiery trials or not. Suffering doesn’t always look like death, cancer, or disease. Suffering is struggling with worry, a marriage that is hard, a child that doesn’t respond to discipline, a day in which everything seems to go wrong. And even in those moments, He is conforming us. Making us more like Him. Yes, the massive tragedies may strike. They do strike. But I have a feeling I will regret worrying about them so much when they do come.
Enjoy today, friends! Tomorrow will worry about itself. And you know what? He will give us the grace.
Here’s to a day full of joy!